RECAP: "Chainsaw"-Scream Queens S1, E3

Another dramatic episode of Scream Queens! It's a horror-comedy soap opera that I can't help watching. (By the way, last week's two hour premiere counts as two episodes, in case there's any confusion why we're at episode 3).  At the beginning of the episode, Zayday and Grace go to a convenience store to grab some snacks, and talk about Pete's having a Red Devil costume in his closet. Zayday is extremely suspicious of him, and she makes Grace promise to never go anywhere alone. At that moment, though, we see that the Red Devil is in the store! Once the ladies see him, Grace tases him  and Zayday pushes over a shelf on him. Turns out that it's this guy Eugene from Zayday's Political Science class! But is he really involved?

Back at the Kappa House, Chanel and Number 5 discover that, like Ms. Bean, Number Two's body is missing from the freezer. Number 5 is over this entire situation, and wants to quit Kappa, stating that all of this is Chanel's problem since she's Kappa president.

Meanwhile, Zayday and Grace goes into Number 2's room, and finds a huge stain on the floor. Denise comes in stating that it probably is blood, telling them to hit the light as she sprays luminol, revealing that it is blood (duh). She's the only one who makes any kind of sense on this show. Nobody's looking for this girl, even though Number 2 tweeted that she was being murdered by the Red Devil! However, there are still current Instagram posts from her account, which throws Zayday and Grace off. They decide to go to Bel Air to visit Number 2's parents to see if they can get any insight on where she might be.

Later that night, there is a Take Back The Night vigil in honor of Tiffany and Boone (though only Tiffany is really dead). While there, people are holding up signs to separate themselves from Kappa so they don't get killed by the Red Devil. Clearly, Kappa House is a social pariah at Wallace University this year. Chanel tries to make up with Chad, simply asking him to have sex with a smaller number of people (GIRL WHET?!), but Chad freaks out like it's not a problem at all that he cheats, of course. He tells her to pray that all the pledges get murdered so she can be popular again, and maybe he'll give her another chance. Dean Munsch tries to silence the truth that there is a serial killer on the loose, stating that Tiffany's murder is still being investigated to see if it was a murder and that Boone's death was a suicide (but who slashes their own throat to kill themselves lady?). She also announces that Eugene was not actually the serial killer. Because of the incident at the store, it has been determined that the Red Devil mascot is no longer appropriate to represent the university now, and they get a new mascot--Coney, an actual ice cream cone. The Wallace University Cones...how about that?

Later, Zayday, Grace and Denise go to Bel Air to talk to Number 2's parents and express their concerns
that she may be missing. Her parents reveal that Chad and Number 2 were messing around, and he even came to their house for Thanksgiving! Who hasn't this boy slept with?! Though normally parents would be worried about their kid, Number 2's parents don't even want the girl to come home! But why?

The next day, during Grace's film studies class, her father Wes pops up as the new professor, though he actually teaches literature. She storms out angrily, knowing that he's only here to watch her. Wes continues the class though, showing The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in class, which is freaky considering everything going on on campus. Afterwards, Gigi speaks to him, announcing that she is starting a teacher's neighborhood watch, and invites him too. Dean Munsch comes in, and invites Gigi to her tennis court to talk about something later as well.

Later, a young nerd named Aaron Cohen is revealed to be the Coney mascot. Surprisingly, everyone loves the mascot, and he even plans to be a professional mascot. However, the Red Devil comes in, and hacks him to death with a chainsaw at his prime!

Meanwhile, Hester goes into Chanel's closet and tries on clothes, and, of course, Chanel busts her. Apparently, Karl Lagerfeld is close to Chanel's parents, so that's why she gets so many clothes. Hester always wanted to be a fashionista herself, and Chanel plans to fix her up a bit so she won't be such a disaster. Dean Munsch and Gigi meet up for tennis, where the Dean tells Gigi that they are going to move into Kappa House for a week to continue to try to be "good examples" for the Kappa girls. She also warns Gigi  to stay away from "her man" Wes. Delusional woman.

Later, Number 3 talks to Sam (the lesbian pledge in the house...this is the first time I remember actually hearing the girl's real name), and reveals that she wants to be best friends. "Like...soul mates," she says with a huge hug, because she wants to reveal a secret. She is a child of the owners of Swenson frozen dinners (the B-list of Swanson frozen dinners), stating she is a billionaire. However, her dad isn't her real dad. She reveals that her mom was crazy paranoid, and a year before Number 3 was born, she started corresponding and having conjugal visits with serial killer Charles Manson! Number 3 took a DNA test, which revealed that he is her real dad. She doesn't want anyone to know because if people found out the truth, they would automatically think that she is the killer. Number 3 asks Sam to be her alibi when the next murder happens, and she'll look out for Sam, too.

Meanwhile Grace and Zayday go talk to Number 5 about Chad dating Number 2, and we find out that he dated Number 5 too (again, who wasn't this boy sleeping with?!). Chanel reveals Hester's new look, and that Hester will become Chanel #6. Number 5 goes off on Chanel, telling her that a pledge shouldn't get to be a Chanel and that Chanel herself isn't fit to be president. Chanel dismisses Number 5's words, and announces another hazing activity for the pledges, when Dean Munsch and Gigi walk in with their bags to stay there for the rest of the week. Needless to say, the pledges are shocked!

Later, Chad holds a meeting with the senior council of the Dickie Dollar Scholars, who find out that Boone was gay, though Chad doesn't think his death was a suicide. He even saw bloody footprints in the hallway! He proposes that they run through the streets with baseball bats, call out the Red Devil, and avenge Boone's death, which the rest of these fools go along with.

Meanwhile, Grace goes to see Pete, and apologizes for not returning his messages and thinking that he
was the killer. She thinks that Chad is actually the killer, revealing how he's been with basically every girl at Kappa, and has a knife obsession. She wonders if Chad is the baby from 20 years ago? Pete has been doing some research himself, but there is no record of any of the girls at Kappa that year except for a former sister with the last name Greenwell, who was two credits short of graduating that year. He found her, though she's six hours away.

That night, the Dickie Dollar Scholars roam the streets, jacking up a random car they see. The Red Devil appears with a chainsaw, but then another one appears behind him! They split up to try to attack both, but, of course, the chainsaws rips their bats apart. One guy gets his arms cut off trying to save Chad! Meanwhile, Denise picks up Zayday as she walks back to Kappa, but handcuffs Zayday to her, believing that she's the killer. Denise has found out that Zayday plans to challenge Chanel to become Kappa president, and found a CD the girl bought from Best Buy where Shondell worked. She thinks Zayday may be working with someone else, and that's how Shondell was killed, even though Zayday was in the Kappa house at the time of the murder. Denise even pulls out a tweet Zayday sent to Shonda Rhimes about her show, How To Get Away With Murder, stating that if Annalise Keating really wanted to get away with murder, she would team up with somebody to do it! AND ZAYDAY HAD A CHAINSAW UNDER HER BED TOO! Zayday explains that her grandmother sent her the chainsaw after her taser was taken away, and Denise lets her go. However, she plans to keep an eye on Zayday, and now I am too. It makes some sense, and, with this crazy show, everybody is a suspect here!

Gigi and Wes have dinner with Dean Munsch, and Zayday practices pulling out the chainsaw from under her bed. When she comes downstairs to go to her philosophy study group, Wes discovers Grace isn't with her and Zayday has no idea where she could be. He quickly leaves to call Grace, who lies and says she's at the library, though she left with Pete to go find this ex-Kappa.

As they try to sleep, Gigi butts heads with the Dean over the Dean playing loud whale distress calls to lull herself to sleep, which she changes to murder victims screaming. Gigi leaves the room, which Dean Munsch planned all along. As Gigi makes a bed on the couch downstairs, the Red Devil appears with his chainsaw, trying to kill her! Wes comes in to try to save her, and gets cut in the process, and the Red Devil escapes. As Dean Munsch comes down to see what the commotion is, Wes and Gigi stop her in her tracks, believing that Dean Munsch is the killer! This is all too much. Literally EVERYONE IS A SUSPECT!

Check out all new episodes of Scream Queens on Tuesdays at 9 p.m. ET only on FOX!

Images via FOX

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